It’s not uncommon for toddlers to go through phases of picky eating or outright food refusal.
They might be particular about colours, textures, or even foods touching on the plate.
Your little one might be stuck in the “beige stage,” only eating plain foods like rice, pasta, or chicken nuggets.
It’s so normal to be concerned about their food intake and overall wellbeing. That’s why our team of dietitians are here to guide you through the picky eating phase.
Why has my child started refusing meals?
Toddlers often go through a fussy eating stage as a normal part of their development.
As they begin to assert their independence, they may become more selective about what they eat, often rejecting foods they previously enjoyed. T
his phase is also influenced by their slower growth rate, which reduces their appetite. Additionally, toddlers are naturally wary of new foods—a behavior known as neophobia—which can lead to reluctance in trying different tastes and textures. While this can be frustrating for parents, it’s important to stay patient, offer a variety of healthy options, and avoid pressuring them to eat, as this phase typically resolves on its own over time
With so many variables at play, it’s essential to remember that food refusal is a normal part of toddlerhood and not a reflection of your parenting.
Should I offer a different meal when my child won’t eat?
First things first, let’s recall the number one rule when it comes to mealtimes:
- You as the parent are in charge of what is served, when food is offered, and where the meal takes place. For instance, you might decide to serve spaghetti bolognese at 12pm at the dining table.
- Your child is responsible for whether they choose to eat the meal and how much they decide to consume.
Offering an alternative meal essentially shifts the responsibility of choosing what is for dinner from you to your child, which can make mealtimes more stressful and unpredictable. While it might result in a win in the short-term, long term it is more likely to perpetuate the fussy eating cycle.
As mums ourselves we get it. It is worrying when they refuse a meal – especially dinner! We worry too that if our kids don’t eat dinner then they will wake up in the night and say they’re hungry. But as paediatric dietitians we recommend that you don’t offer an alternative meal. Instead we have some strategies that you can put into practice (see below).
So what can I do if they refuse the meal?
If your child refuses a meal, it’s important to stay calm and not rush to find an alternative. Here are some strategies to handle the situation:
- Reassure your child: Let them know that there will be another chance to eat soon if they’re not interested in the current meal. This helps them feel secure about future mealtimes.
- Offer a pre-bed snack: If dinner is turned down, consider providing a small snack before bed. This should be offered later in the evening, not immediately after the refused meal. Options like yogurt with chopped blueberries, cheese with sliced tomatoes and crackers, or a banana with peanut butter provide good fats and can help your child feel satisfied for a better night’s sleep.
- Include family favourites and child-friendly options: Ensure that your meals include a variety of foods that both you and your child enjoy. Incorporate meats, vegetables, and carbs like bread, rice, or pasta. This approach increases the chances that your child will eat something, even if they’re not very hungry or tired. Remember, a child’s appetite can vary, so regularly offer different foods and avoid serving the exact same meals repeatedly.
By following these strategies, you can help make mealtimes less stressful and more balanced for your child.
Bottom Line
Some meals will be a hit, while others might not be as successful. It’s important to remember that this is perfectly normal and not a reflection of your efforts. Your child might simply be having an off day. Rest assured, they will likely make up for it at their next meal or the following day
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- For more information and extra tips, check out our toddler feeding program, Little Bites.
- Follow us Instagram @thebitingtruthkids